See introvert is a personality northwestmusicscene.info a personality problem You can change your habits, but Answered Oct 12, · Author has answers and k answer views such as making new friends, interviewing for a job, or getting a date. Here's how to make a long-term relationship work when one partner is a not to say that extrovert-introvert couples aren't without their problems. Be sure to listen to the answers, before jumping in with your exuberance.”. Is there a solution? Like a library date where we both read books and occasionally throw each other shy glances? Do I just need to swallow my.
As a result, we are painfully awkward around each other. We've both tried to have get-to-know-you conversations, but the interactions end up being painfully stilted -- even when we're both inebriated.
The two-introvert problem
The last time I dated an introvert, I played the drama queen. In exchange for his putting up with my emotional outbursts, I mommied my then boyfriend. That's the only way I know how to interact romantically with an introvert -- and I'm uninterested in repeating it. That leaves me in the dark. I find myself caring about this person deeply even though I don't know him well. I really want to ask him out on a date, but I'm afraid that it will turn out be fatally awkward because I'm unwilling to play the role of the talkative self-explorer which would enable him to stay in his comfort zone as the questioner.
Is there a solution? Like a library date where we both read books and occasionally throw each other shy glances? Do I just need to swallow my fear, step out and express myself even though it's about as comfortable as walking naked through glass wool insulation? Or is it really true that an introvert needs to date an extrovert, a serious person needs to date a lighthearted one, etc.? Am I whispering up the wrong tree?
Apparently what we have here is an area of human interaction -- courtship -- so completely colonized by extroverts that even an intelligent and thoughtful person such as yourself is only dimly aware that there might be alternatives. And yet there must be alternatives.
Otherwise, introverts would never reproduce. And I refuse to countenance the notion that these alternatives just take the form of painfully awkward reenactments of extroverted styles.
There must be another way. I'm not sure if you were being sarcastic or not, but the library date sounds perfectly reasonable to me. As does the bookstore date. As does just being silent with each other.
The Introvert-Extrovert Dilemma » Together
The other day I watched an attractive young couple come into a cafe. The young man went to the counter and got some coffee drinks. The woman sat at the table.
- 7 Introvert Problems Solved!
The young man came back and they sat drinking their coffee drinks. They looked at each other. They looked at the table. They looked around the room. They drank their drinks.
They seemed comfortable with each other, and yet there was also a kind of intensity in the air. If you work on these issues early in your relationship and tell the truth instead of blindsiding your partner with a deluge after a string of resentments, listening and hearing will be easier.
The acknowledgment of who your partner is and what they need will go a long way toward helping you come to a mutual solution. Go to the wedding together on Saturday, whether you really want to or not. This might mean finding your favorite introvert friend during the reception and sitting with him or her.
But the next day, say no to the Superbowl party. The compromise comes in doing the extroverted activity one day, the introverted activity the next. A co-worker of mine and his wife do this often. The husband is much more outgoing than the wife, so she joins him in after-work gatherings about once every three times. We may have even done it often enough that we realize how futile that is.
In truth, one of the things you like best about your extrovert partner is that she is fun and easy-going. Trying to impose a new temperament on someone is like pressuring them to have blue eyes instead of brown. Develop a list of go-to activities that are fun for both of you. This may take a while, but as you begin to notice events that seem workable for both personality types, keep track of them.10 Introvert Problems: Dating/Relationships